[ Honestly, she knew this text was coming. She'd seen Monika in that audience, after all. She hand't... approached. Partially out of her own guilt, but also just genuine uncertainty as to how Monika would process the truth of her mother. And even with all of that, she felt like a hypocrite. She'd accepted and comforted Monika, whose 'truth' was so much more tremendous in her own, by her view, anyways. And yet somehow she hadn't expected Monika to be as accepting of her?
It was... never pleasant, realizing how deep that vein of guilt ran. ]
The person in that outfit hasn't really existed for a long time.
[It made more sense now, the way Chariot would often speak about her. Words like her star was shining so bright, whereas Chariot's had gotten so very dim.
Yes, compared to how she was now, her mom did used to be far more animated.
And bold!]
I never got meet to you in person back then, so I guess I might be a little biased when I say this:
I like you just the way you are.
The fact that you're still trying to do your best, after everything that happened...
She'd never really... been asked that so directly. It made her realize that she didn't have quite an exact answer for it. She hadn't kept any of the effects of it. The costume had been left with her producer, all of the old merchandise discarded or kept in storage. Honestly, until she met Akko, she hadn't even seen those trading cards in ages.
But... was all of that just part of running away from her own past? Did she ever genuinely miss being everyone's star? ]
I don't know. I haven't really thought about it in such plain terms. After the moon scar, everyone just sort of agreed it was best that Shiny Chariot disappear. I guess I spent so much time distancing myself from that person that I never stopped to look back until Akko came to Luna Nova.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
text;
I saw some of your memories and...
You looked nice, in your stage outfit!
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It was... never pleasant, realizing how deep that vein of guilt ran. ]
The person in that outfit hasn't really existed for a long time.
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Yes, compared to how she was now, her mom did used to be far more animated.
And bold!]
I never got meet to you in person back then, so I guess I might be a little biased when I say this:
I like you just the way you are.
The fact that you're still trying to do your best, after everything that happened...
Just shows that you're really strong.
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Thank you for saying that, Monika. And
if you'd ever like to know more about Shiny Chariot
[ it's left unfinished, but... it was clearly an offer. ]
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Did she?
She'd never really... been asked that so directly. It made her realize that she didn't have quite an exact answer for it. She hadn't kept any of the effects of it. The costume had been left with her producer, all of the old merchandise discarded or kept in storage. Honestly, until she met Akko, she hadn't even seen those trading cards in ages.
But... was all of that just part of running away from her own past? Did she ever genuinely miss being everyone's star? ]
I don't know. I haven't really thought about it in such plain terms. After the moon scar, everyone just sort of agreed it was best that Shiny Chariot disappear. I guess I spent so much time distancing myself from that person that I never stopped to look back until Akko came to Luna Nova.
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I doubt I'll ever know the whole story, and I'm okay with that.
[She didn't want to push, and like herself, some parts of their past were better left buried.]
But wouldn't it be okay to start to thinking about what you'd like, instead?
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[ What she'd like... ]
is what I have. A wonderful daughter, the love of some amazing people, work that's fulfilling. I don't need to be Shiny Chariot again.
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[Much like Chariot had always offered unconditional love and support, so would she.]
I love you, mom.
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[ ... ]
No matter what happens, so long as we have this faith in each other's happiness, I think we'll be okay.