[ She'd known what happened. She didn't need to be there. She'd felt it. Every blow. Every swell of anger and despair, the self-loathing, the guilt. Every bit of it seeped through the bond like the toxin in her blood, amplified by her connection to both of them. So she didn't need to ask at all the circumstances of Fang's arrival. There was no mystery to puzzle out, or interrogation to be carried.
But knowing what happened, and understanding why... were different matters. And she didn't disguise the nakedness of her own mire, as well, knowing what had likely lead to it all.
She was there to open the door before she even announced her presence, a warmed towel in her hand, ready to hand to Fang, ready to... to do something. Anything. To comfort her. To yell at her. To just...
She wanted to do so many things. To say so many things. But in the end, she could only stand silent as the rain continued to poor around them, the grip on her cane so tight her knuckles had turned white... ]
[What others thought of her was not normally something that concerned Fang. But here, in this moment of tense, palpable silence, she couldn't help the keen awareness of her mistakes. Chariot's tumultuous feelings, her silence, her white knuckles—it humbled Fang.]
[The icy lead pit in her stomach returned, feeding off it, whispering guilt and threatening to extinguish that little flickering ember in her spirit.]
[Fang swallowed, her throat tight. But instead of bowing her head, she inhaled slowly, her gaze briefly flickering up to the ceiling. When it returned to Chariot, squarely meeting her eyes, Fang stood a little straighter.]
Sorry. About that. [Her throat was still tight and made the words crackle a little hoarsely, but... there was no feebleness in them. Sincere regret, perhaps, but her tone bored a shadow of the strength that had been absent for weeks.]
[ The towel she'd warmed was forgotten, dropped to the floor. The sound of her cane joining it was heard as well, the clatter of its polished, carved metal against the wood of the floor. And in a flash, a rush, she was within Fang's arms, clinging, desperate, all of her energy pouring into the Bond, positive, negative, all of it. The fear, the frustration, the gratitude that Fang was okay, that she'd came back, that she was there and... ]
I told you... I told you not to do this to yourself... [ She could barely manage the word through her tears. And there was an unspoken gladness, though, at the edge of those sobbing words, that Fang was Home, all the same. Home was where she could heal. Home was where Chariot could help her drive out the poison of guilt... together... ]
[The suddenness of the movement almost startled her, but Fang didn't waste any time in wrapping one arm around her Bonded's waist and the other around her back to cradle her head, protest for her sodden state not even crossing her mind. Her eyes closed; a slow exhale left Fang as she just sank into that energy, swimming in it, soaking all of it in.]
I know, [she answered after a long moment, tilting her head gently against Chariot's. And for some reason, her lips tugged into a smile.]
I refuse... to lose you to this... [ Chariot whispered against Fang, her voice choked. Fang remembered this time. But she knew it wouldn't be the last time. It would keep happening. There was no simple 'well i'm okay now' when it came to this. They both knew it. But Chariot was resolved as ever to hold on to Fang, to keep her grip on her and anchor her through those waves. He just wish she'd been there, been there to stop this from...
No. No that's just walking in circles, isn't it? ]
You won't. Promise. [Fang was confidant of that much. The question was of how much damage it would leave, when it was all well and done.] I don't know how to give up.
[She squeezed Chariot gently in her arms, then loosened her grip. One hand lingered by her waist to support her in case she wobbled.]
Could really do with warmin' up and cleanin' this crud outta my fur. It'll drive me nuts if I let it dry.
R-right... [ Back to immediate reality of Fang's sorry state, and Chariot realized she'd left her cane on the ground. She held on to Fang for support, keeping herself as steady as she could to clear the way for Fang so they could both get back in.
Once inside, and with her cane again, she handed Fang both the warm towel and a hot drink, a mix of warm tea and brandy that would hopefully soothe away any discomfort. ]
[The warmed towel is, honestly, blissful after the prolonged cold. Fang pressed her face into it for a long moment, relishing the way it both warmed her fingers and soothed the lingering ache in her face.]
[She sighed into the towel before half-heartedly scrubbing it through her wet hair with one hand.]
Won't say no to that. [Most of her fur was on her back, after all. The tea-brandy burns on the way down and isn't exactly to Fang's tastes, but the warmth is too welcome. Even then, the gesture of the drink alone was sweet.]
Real considerate of you to have these ready. [Fang flashed her Bonded a half-smile, tainted only by a little sheepishness from why Chariot had the items at the ready. The Turnskin wandered into the washroom to start the water, sipping at the tea-brandy as she went.]
[ The sound of Chariot's cane followed behind her, close, remaining so as Fang let the water warm. She sat herself down on the edge of the tub, in a small fold-out chair that Mio had installed for her so that she could clean up more easily while recovering... ]
It's not being considerate, it's... it's what home should be like, shouldn't it?
[Fang doesn't respond immediately, but there's a bright spark of warmth in the Bond, almost like the concept surprised her. As Fang craned her head for the mirror, she was smiling as if she wasn't idly tracing the path of one of the angry remains of clawmarks. Gods, she'd gotten lucky. A fraction over, and she would've lost the eye.]
Yeah... Yeah, it should. Guess I still forget, every now and then. It's... been a long time, you know? [Her voiced quieted a little sheepishly—but fondly—at the end. Home. Something that, before getting abducted into a mirror, Fang had resigned herself to never knowing again.]
[Fang doesn't spend long glancing at the freshly-healed wounds. She set the half-full cup aside, peeling off her sodden clothes with a shiver.]
[ Chariot doesn't have access to the magic she wants to, that would make all of this easier, but she manages to not let herself be distracted by Fang's sudden nakedness. Her emotions were still running quite a bit raw... she wanted to focus.
Warm, wet compress. A healing salve she'd worked up ages ago. Gently applied where she could, cleaning as she went along. Slow, meditative... ]
[After being out in the storm, the warmth of the bath is a godsend. The heat stings her silver burns something awful, twisted and raw around her wrists and neck, but Fang had finally been cleared to keep them uncovered; she wasn't about to wrap them back up. The salve does wonders to sooth the sensitive scars, though.]
[Fang leaned immediately into the pressure, and it wasn't long before her shoulders and head slumped forward without tension. Eyes closed, just breathing, just... being. Letting herself be cared for, letting herself be vulnerable. As Chariot cleaned her fur and soothed the lingering aches, Fang mindlessly began growling that pseudo-purr of hers on each exhalation.]
[There was a lot she had to think about, and something she wanted to ask her Bonded. But just for a few minutes... they could leave the tangled complicated mess of the evening to the side and let this soothing moment be their whole world.]
[ When Fang started to visibly relax, so did Chariot. Her worries were still there, the constant background noise of their lives as always, but she could focus on her work, of tending, of giving service out of love for the other woman. Easing her burdens, soothing her wounds.
After a few moments, she leaned forward to press her forehead against Fang's, letting out a small sigh. ]
[Fang's arms sluggishly rose from the water to loosely circle Chariot's waist, leaning so slightly more into her weight. She needed this, this warmth—after today, and this last month in general.]
Am I too kind, or is it you feel you don't deserve this kindness?
[ On the nose, but... not that it was clear Chariot was willing to forgive what happened, there was still things they needed to put into the air between them, to make their way through, to deal with in some way.
One incident, and Chariot forgiving her, Fang saying she'd remembered, wasn't going to magically lift Fang's guilt away. ]
[It was no magical cure, but one incident, one hard push, and a second choice was enough to create a spark—enough to make embers flicker again in her drowning heart. This was necessary conversation, but it does put a slight damper on basking in the warmth. Fang at least takes a moment to consider the question.]
Both, but that's nothin' new, [She murmurs back honestly; Chariot would've known if she wasn't being truthful. The question reminds her a little of prior conversations with a certain merrow. Deserve was such a tricky word, and had roots so much deeper than this incident.] After smashin' a chunk outta a small planet, guess I don't deserve much.
But that's not the point, is it? Life never gives anyone what they deserve. Only matters what you have.
[There's a bit of cynicism, buried in that. It's a bitter truth Fang's come to harbor over the course of her long life.]
Sounds great to me, [Fang grumbled tiredly. She's always quick to discount the past—perhaps too quick, as it's been pointed out to her. But to hear such a suggestion coming from Chariot, of all people... brought an odd measure of peace. The things that Fang would sacrifice, just to put the same idea in Vanille's head...]
[The turnskin reluctantly let go to give Chariot more room to move, but not before pressing a gentle kiss to her neck. Fang brushed her bangs back out of her face and reclined in the bath, casually—if shamelessly—watching the Witch undress.]
...Look, home or not... Thanks. For bein' here. Means a lot to me.
[ At first her actions had just been casual, if not a little hurried, no thought put into observation or presentation at all, just a desire to be with Fang as close as possible and yet... When she realized Fang's eyes were upon her, she slowed, catching her eyes, and slowing her hands down, making certain to draw out the motions.
A part of her that had grown, the part of her that adored Fang's attention... All talks aside, all heavy conversations aside, that sort of thing... that sort of thing had its place, too. ]
[No stammering, no flustering—Fang hadn't been expecting her motions to slow. Green eyes flicked up to meet red, a delighted amusement meeting that intensity.]
[Fang cocked her head to the side, her mouth crooking up at the corner.]
Tease.
[But warmth and affection filled that complaint—if it could be called a complaint. Fang loved teasing, and being teased.]
[ Fang, and Ramesses, had done a great deal of work to put Chariot at ease with her own sensuality. They both gave her fertile soil to blossom within, even if she'd be considered 'late' doing so by most standards. That was fine. Fang's appreciation spoke volumes, after all.
She let out a soft little huff, not speeding up, but shifting her position to push her chest through the already open part of the blouse. No bra beneath... not for sexy reasons, she just hadn't been wearing one while homebound for the most part. It only came on if she was heading out. Which Fang had saved her the trouble of... ]
[Her Bonded's come a long way towards being comfortable in her own skin—something Fang's glad for. Fang allowed her eyes to sweep down in an appreciative glance, letting her attention wash over Chariot in that way she's grown to love.]
[One of Fang's hands lazily rose up, fingers ghosting Chariot's hip, leaving little water trails across the fabric.]
You know, if I were feelin' a little more spirited, I'd just pull you in as you are.
[The tea, the tender touch, the heat of the bath, it was all a wonderful distraction from the ache in her bones and her face, but Fang still wasn't free of this long day's fatigue.]
[ And I'd probably lose my nerve and scold you for getting my clothes wet. Probably... not likely, at this point. She shrugged the blouse away, using her cane to stand back up, away from those hands, and let loose the waist ties of the simple house pants she was wearing, allowing them to simply fall away, but by bit, a thumb hooking into the hem of the panties beneath.
Nothing she was wearing was, well. MEANT to be sexy. It was all very simple and plain. House clothes for someone who couldn't go out much. But Fang's words, the way her eyes fixated on her, made her feel like she was a super model.
The show was over after a few more moments, though, and she set her cane aside, having faith she could crawl into the tub on top of Fang easily enough. ]
[The clothes never needed to be sexy. Fang's focus was always on Chariot herself. What she was wearing... never felt important.]
[Her crooked smirk spread into a satisfied smile as she watched. The transition was easy, at least, offering steady and supporting hands where needed. The tub was a little bit of a cramped fit for the two of them, water spilling out, since Fang was on the taller side and Chariot not much shorter.]
[Fang sighed happily, her hands immediately starting a slow glide over her Bonded's back. ]
If you're not gonna say anything, you should at least do the decent thing and shut me up.
[ In truth, she'd clammed up mostly because her nerves were a little bit strung up. Not the sort of barbed worry that Fang would fear otherwise that came with Chariot's anxiety, but just... the lack of trust in herself to not say something silly or foolish. It wasn't like she was trying to play coy! But...
Well. Fang had a good idea, either way. Settling in, straddling her bonded, she leaned in to do just that, shutting up Fang with a press of her lips to hers, humming into the embrace, letting herself soak in the moment, the warmth of her lover, and all of those wonderful feelings that prickled between them...
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But knowing what happened, and understanding why... were different matters. And she didn't disguise the nakedness of her own mire, as well, knowing what had likely lead to it all.
She was there to open the door before she even announced her presence, a warmed towel in her hand, ready to hand to Fang, ready to... to do something. Anything. To comfort her. To yell at her. To just...
She wanted to do so many things. To say so many things. But in the end, she could only stand silent as the rain continued to poor around them, the grip on her cane so tight her knuckles had turned white... ]
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[The icy lead pit in her stomach returned, feeding off it, whispering guilt and threatening to extinguish that little flickering ember in her spirit.]
[Fang swallowed, her throat tight. But instead of bowing her head, she inhaled slowly, her gaze briefly flickering up to the ceiling. When it returned to Chariot, squarely meeting her eyes, Fang stood a little straighter.]
Sorry. About that. [Her throat was still tight and made the words crackle a little hoarsely, but... there was no feebleness in them. Sincere regret, perhaps, but her tone bored a shadow of the strength that had been absent for weeks.]
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I told you... I told you not to do this to yourself... [ She could barely manage the word through her tears. And there was an unspoken gladness, though, at the edge of those sobbing words, that Fang was Home, all the same. Home was where she could heal. Home was where Chariot could help her drive out the poison of guilt... together... ]
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I know, [she answered after a long moment, tilting her head gently against Chariot's. And for some reason, her lips tugged into a smile.]
I remembered. I owe you one for that.
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I refuse... to lose you to this... [ Chariot whispered against Fang, her voice choked. Fang remembered this time. But she knew it wouldn't be the last time. It would keep happening. There was no simple 'well i'm okay now' when it came to this. They both knew it. But Chariot was resolved as ever to hold on to Fang, to keep her grip on her and anchor her through those waves. He just wish she'd been there, been there to stop this from...
No. No that's just walking in circles, isn't it? ]
Let's go inside...
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[She squeezed Chariot gently in her arms, then loosened her grip. One hand lingered by her waist to support her in case she wobbled.]
Could really do with warmin' up and cleanin' this crud outta my fur. It'll drive me nuts if I let it dry.
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Once inside, and with her cane again, she handed Fang both the warm towel and a hot drink, a mix of warm tea and brandy that would hopefully soothe away any discomfort. ]
I can help clean you up...
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[She sighed into the towel before half-heartedly scrubbing it through her wet hair with one hand.]
Won't say no to that. [Most of her fur was on her back, after all. The tea-brandy burns on the way down and isn't exactly to Fang's tastes, but the warmth is too welcome. Even then, the gesture of the drink alone was sweet.]
Real considerate of you to have these ready. [Fang flashed her Bonded a half-smile, tainted only by a little sheepishness from why Chariot had the items at the ready. The Turnskin wandered into the washroom to start the water, sipping at the tea-brandy as she went.]
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It's not being considerate, it's... it's what home should be like, shouldn't it?
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Yeah... Yeah, it should. Guess I still forget, every now and then. It's... been a long time, you know? [Her voiced quieted a little sheepishly—but fondly—at the end. Home. Something that, before getting abducted into a mirror, Fang had resigned herself to never knowing again.]
[Fang doesn't spend long glancing at the freshly-healed wounds. She set the half-full cup aside, peeling off her sodden clothes with a shiver.]
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Warm, wet compress. A healing salve she'd worked up ages ago. Gently applied where she could, cleaning as she went along. Slow, meditative... ]
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[Fang leaned immediately into the pressure, and it wasn't long before her shoulders and head slumped forward without tension. Eyes closed, just breathing, just... being. Letting herself be cared for, letting herself be vulnerable. As Chariot cleaned her fur and soothed the lingering aches, Fang mindlessly began growling that pseudo-purr of hers on each exhalation.]
[There was a lot she had to think about, and something she wanted to ask her Bonded. But just for a few minutes... they could leave the tangled complicated mess of the evening to the side and let this soothing moment be their whole world.]
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After a few moments, she leaned forward to press her forehead against Fang's, letting out a small sigh. ]
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You're too kind, you know that? [She murmured.]
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Am I too kind, or is it you feel you don't deserve this kindness?
[ On the nose, but... not that it was clear Chariot was willing to forgive what happened, there was still things they needed to put into the air between them, to make their way through, to deal with in some way.
One incident, and Chariot forgiving her, Fang saying she'd remembered, wasn't going to magically lift Fang's guilt away. ]
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Both, but that's nothin' new, [She murmurs back honestly; Chariot would've known if she wasn't being truthful. The question reminds her a little of prior conversations with a certain merrow. Deserve was such a tricky word, and had roots so much deeper than this incident.] After smashin' a chunk outta a small planet, guess I don't deserve much.
But that's not the point, is it? Life never gives anyone what they deserve. Only matters what you have.
[There's a bit of cynicism, buried in that. It's a bitter truth Fang's come to harbor over the course of her long life.]
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... Or we should both try to stop thinking less in terms of whether we deserve any of this.
[ Her hands moved to start pulling away her shirt, button by button. Apparently she intended to join Fang in that tub. ]
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[The turnskin reluctantly let go to give Chariot more room to move, but not before pressing a gentle kiss to her neck. Fang brushed her bangs back out of her face and reclined in the bath, casually—if shamelessly—watching the Witch undress.]
...Look, home or not... Thanks. For bein' here. Means a lot to me.
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A part of her that had grown, the part of her that adored Fang's attention... All talks aside, all heavy conversations aside, that sort of thing... that sort of thing had its place, too. ]
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[Fang cocked her head to the side, her mouth crooking up at the corner.]
Tease.
[But warmth and affection filled that complaint—if it could be called a complaint. Fang loved teasing, and being teased.]
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She let out a soft little huff, not speeding up, but shifting her position to push her chest through the already open part of the blouse. No bra beneath... not for sexy reasons, she just hadn't been wearing one while homebound for the most part. It only came on if she was heading out. Which Fang had saved her the trouble of... ]
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[One of Fang's hands lazily rose up, fingers ghosting Chariot's hip, leaving little water trails across the fabric.]
You know, if I were feelin' a little more spirited, I'd just pull you in as you are.
[The tea, the tender touch, the heat of the bath, it was all a wonderful distraction from the ache in her bones and her face, but Fang still wasn't free of this long day's fatigue.]
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Nothing she was wearing was, well. MEANT to be sexy. It was all very simple and plain. House clothes for someone who couldn't go out much. But Fang's words, the way her eyes fixated on her, made her feel like she was a super model.
The show was over after a few more moments, though, and she set her cane aside, having faith she could crawl into the tub on top of Fang easily enough. ]
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[Her crooked smirk spread into a satisfied smile as she watched. The transition was easy, at least, offering steady and supporting hands where needed. The tub was a little bit of a cramped fit for the two of them, water spilling out, since Fang was on the taller side and Chariot not much shorter.]
[Fang sighed happily, her hands immediately starting a slow glide over her Bonded's back. ]
If you're not gonna say anything, you should at least do the decent thing and shut me up.
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Well. Fang had a good idea, either way. Settling in, straddling her bonded, she leaned in to do just that, shutting up Fang with a press of her lips to hers, humming into the embrace, letting herself soak in the moment, the warmth of her lover, and all of those wonderful feelings that prickled between them...
The water could spill out. She didn't care. ]
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